by WOTNOPOLIS: The Mysterious Disappearances
Little Shiro read the names off his clipboard. “Toshii, Jz, Zergio, Zakku,” Little Shiro rattled on. “Renden, Briex.”
“That’s not that many names,” KKQ said. “Are you sure it’s not just all coincidence?”
“That all these people have gone missing in the span of two days? Maybe it is. Some of these people we don’t really know where they are on a normal day,” Shiro said. “But the fact that they were reported missing is strange.”
“Hm,” KKQ mulled over the matter as she ate a muffin.
“These disappearances are happening all over the city, though,” Shiro said. “Which makes it less likely that they are linked.”
“Well,” KKQ smiled. “Don’t go missing, Shiro!”
“I’ll try not to,” Shiro laughed as he watched her leave the office. He studied the chart a while longer. He felt like there was something he was missing and if they didn’t find out soon they’d be in trouble.
****
“Turn up the news,” the Eagle gang yelled as they gathered around the TV sitting in the bar. “It’s Shadowed Gless!”
“Woo!” Yoyo cheered as she got comfy. “The best reporter in WOTNOPOLIS.”
“Today we’re looking deeper into the WOTNOPOLIS disappearances,” SG said as she looked into the camera. “What began as a few disappearances has exploded in size. The following people have been reported missing in the past few hours: Peinq, Reshii, Crispin, and Darnas. It is beginning to seem like no one is safe.”
“Wow,” Q said. “I didn’t really expect all of those guys to go missing. This is getting pretty serious.”
“Screw Darnas, he’s been missing ever since I kicked his butt in that fight,” Yoyo shrugged. “Next they’ll say Destinykil is missing.”
“Yeah. Isn’t it kind of creepy that the people Yoyo fights go missing afterward?” Bano asked.
The door to the bar flew open and Dark Raptor stared at them. “Yo,” Q said. “What’s up? Here to kill me or something?”
“That plotline was already resolved. Don’t you pay attention? I’m busy being awesome right now,” Dark Raptor rolled his eyes. “But that’s not why I’m here.”
“If you’re here to watch SG she’s already started her segment,” Bano pointed out.
“That’s not it!” Dark Raptor yelled. “My gang! Everyone in my gang went missing.”
“Are you sure they’re not just trying to get away from you?” Yoyo asked.
Dark Raptor glared at them. “No! Someone took out my gang and now they’re all gone. Peinq, Toshii, Reshii! My entire gang. And I think I’m next!”
“Why do you think you’re next?” Bano said.
“Because!” Dark Raptor said. “Well, I don’t know. But I’m the loveable little brother so why not me?”
“You’re not loveable. If someone decides to kill you then you probably deserve it,” Q said.
“Oh come on, guys,” Dark Raptor said. “I’m scared here.”
Temari patted DR on the back and sighed. “Fine, we’ll help you out.”
“We will?” Bano asked. Dark Raptor looked at him sorrowfully.
“I mean, yeah, we will,” Bano shrugged. “Oiy, just leave it to us.”
“You‘re with us, Dark Raptor,” Q smiled. “Even though you’re a real pain, you’ll be back with your gang again tomorrow. We‘ll find a way to make sure it happens. Or if tomorrow‘s not good sometime soon-ish.”
“If they’re not dead,” Yoyo pointed out.
“Thanks a lot guys,” Dark Raptor smiled. “I feel better.”
“Good. Now go away, Sg’s on,” Q shoo’d him with his hand.
“By the way, where’s Cherry Coke?” Dark Raptor asked.
****
Cops from all over WOTNOPOLIS had been gathered together for a meeting inside the Police Headquarters. What was different about this meeting is that it wasn’t only for the police management teams but also the lower level members.
“Hello,” Endless Nothing spoke as he looked at the audience of cop personnel inside the large, dark room. “I’m sure you’ve all heard by now about the sudden string of disappearances. There’s been no clue to who the killer is so we’re calling in an expert detective. He’ll be creating a special team so if you make the cut, good for you.”
Endless Nothing leapt off the stage and caught the edge railing of a hovering helicopter. He pulled himself into the helicopter as it flew away from the scene. “Wow, that was oddly dramatic, even for him,” Shiro noted.
When Shiro saw the person pushing a big TV connected to a video tape he couldn’t help but roll his eyes. “What is Dark Raptor doing here?” he sighed.
After several minutes of playing with the wires a letter popped up on the screen: Q. “Hello, gentleman, I am a robot sent from the future to help you catch the criminal.”
“Freaking awesome!” Shiro heard someone shout.
“No way. That can’t be a robot. But I wonder who he really is?” Shiro heard another person question.
“Oh come on, you don’t know?” Shiro turned and found himself face to face with KKQ. “I expected better from you, Sergeant.”
“I’ve already deduced several things. Quit moving the freaking flashcard with the Q on it while I’m making a dramatic speech Yoyo! If you can hold up two swords against Destinykil I’d think you could at least hold a speech card!” the robot from the future grumbled.
“You just said my name! You’ve completely blown our cover!” Yoyo screamed at Q.
“Mih, we’ll bleep it out in editing or something. The post production staff will take care of it, anyway,” Q mumbled. “Gentleman! I’d like to let you know that I’ve already made great progress on this case and am thankful that you’re allowing me to dive into Police funds and forces to help solve it and find my dog-”
“That explains his motivation,” Shiro rolled his eyes. “How did the mayor get tricked by this?”
“He’s already made great progress? Just what you’d expect from a pro like Q!” Shiro heard someone shout from behind him. He dared not look in case it was KKQ again.
“I have deduced that the mysterious disappearances happened in WOTNOPOLIS. Thus it is very likely that this was an inside job. That’s right. A WOTNOPOLIS citizen most likely played a hand in what happened. Now gentleman, it’s far too late to rule out a vast research facility creating zombies, Alien abductions, or foreigners poaching our citizens for sport, but I do believe a WOTNOPOLIS citizen played a hand in this! Or at least someone who’s been to WOTNOPOLIS recently”
“Really? But WOTNOPOLIS citizens are such models to the community!”
Shiro’s forehead was turning red from all the thorough face palms he’d done so far. He wasn’t sure who the people were in the police force but he could tell why they’d never made it to the upper echelon meetings.
“That’s all I am sharing with you for the time being! But we will be setting up an office soon and be taking care of your resources. I have our first suspect, by the way. We’re bringing in 5 for questioning and hours of water-boarding and other forms of torture. It is far too early for me to divulge why I think he’s the suspect but believe me, he needs to be tortured. Rest not, police of WOTNOPOLIS. This city is in good hands.”
“Don’t you mean rest well? Bah, forget it, cut the camera alre-”
Shiro groaned as he watched Dark Raptor push the cart away without unplugging the TV. He wasn’t sure which was worse. The presentation or the fact that Dark Raptor just kept pushing the cart like the TV hadn’t just fallen off and smashed to pieces.
****
Knssquad quietly baked cookies. She knew the gang was off searching for clues but she was in a cookie baking mood. What she hadn’t expected was the power to go out at that very moment.
“Great, it’s really dark,” Knssquad mumbled. She peeped out the window and frowned. “Odd. Why does the power only seem to be out on this block? Particularly, this spot.”
A loud creaking noise from the back of the bar made her straighten up immediately. “Temari? Cherry Coke? Are one of you guys back there, I can’t see right now?” Knssquad called out.
Her worry heightened as she heard no one answer from the dark. “Hello?” Knssquad whimpered. “You know, I used to make fun of it in horror movies, but I suddenly have the strong urge to go into the basement.”
A strong arm grabbed her shoulder and she immediately sent the person flying back into the darkness. “Take my exploding cookies of death!” Knssquad screamed as she launched the cookie pan into the man’s face.
“Hey, those didn’t explode?” the man questioned but Knssquad repeatedly kicked the cookie pan into his face.
“I already have exploding apples and exploding cookies would just be sorta silly and redundant,” Knssquad said. “And bad for your teeth.”
“Stop attacking me! I’m not here to hurt you. I was sneaking in here because I’m kind of being followed and I thought it was the murderer. I was looking for some help, you see,” the man stuttered. The power came back on and Knssquad realized who she’d been beating. She continued to wail on him harder afterward.
“Stop! Blah. It’s me, Amaterasu!” he shouted.
“I know, that’s why I’m hitting you harder,” Knssquad grumbled as she tossed him out the back door of the bar and shut it.
“What? Look, I know I shot you, but you have to let that go!” Amaterasu said as he pounded desperately on the door.
“Do not, do not!” Knssquad shouted back. “I checked and being shot is something that you are perfectly fine to keep a grudge against someone till you’ve shot them back.”
Amaterasu grew quiet for a moment. “So you’re planning-”
“Oh yes. I will shoot you,” Knssquad smiled gleefully. “And it will hurt.”
“Maybe I’m better off with the murderer,” Amaterasu mumbled. The power went out and Knssquad heard him scream.
“No! Okay! I’m not! Come on, let me in, please?” Amaterasu begged.
Knssquad opened the door and smiled. “But isn’t it your daughter’s birthday today? Weren’t you supposed to give her a present?”
“Eh, what the heck are you doing? If you say something like that my chances of living are drastically decreased!” Amaterasu pleaded.
“I know,” Knssquad grinned. “And you were also going to meet that girl you haven’t seen in ten years. And show her the locket you never let go of.”
“Stop! Stop! You’re killing me! Don’t listen to her, fate! These are lies!”
“Plus you’ve just put away your crazy evil side and are trying to right the wrongs of your past and help the good guys!” Knssquad shouted.
“Oh shoot. That one’s the worst sign of my imminent death and it’s true,” Amaterasu stuttered.
“You’re a goner, buddy,” Knssquad laughed.
She listened for more signs of his pleading but none came. “I guess I could let you in, though, if you buy me pizza. Your treating. Hm? Amaterasu? Amaterasu?”
She opened the back door of the bar and felt a feeling of unease overcome her. “Oh shoot, what happened?” she whispered.
“The same thing that will happen to you.”
****
“So, where’d you get the pipe there, Q?” Yoyo asked.
Q pulled the lead pipe out of his mouth and shrugged. “Over there by that drainage. I don’t really see how pipes help you think as a detective,” he said as he tossed it. Yoyo slowly shook her head in disbelief as it banged noisily against the ground.
“Wow, can you believe the great detective Q is helping us with this case?” Shiro heard a police officer mutter behind his back.
“You freaking idiots! It’s the same Q we chase after on a daily base. If anything, he’s acting dumber than normal! Quit treating him like a super star or like he’s someone else, please!” Shiro griped.
“Shiro, you shouldn’t be upset just because you feel inadequate around someone as great as Q. We’re not expecting you to live up to his standards,” the man walking with Shiro spoke up.
“Oh shut up Tea Cup Holding Character. Don’t you start with me, too,” Shiro said as he marched over to Q. “Any leads yet, oh great detective?” he asked him.
“This is one incredibly tricky case,” Q muttered. “Many different people from many different backgrounds disappearing fast. What is our man after? Is he just a random person snatching killing machine or is there some link we haven’t found? The questions are endless as we hunt for the truth in a world of grey.”
Shiro took the sunglasses off his face and smacked him with him. “Colors have returned to our dark and dreary world!” Q shouted.
Shiro looked over at Bano, Clair, and Yoyo and sighed. “Why are you putting up with this idiot? He’s worse than usual.”
“Yeah, well, it was really bad, but Dark Raptor came up with a great plan for both catching the crook and possibly killing Q,” Yoyo smiled.
“At first I thought it was cruel,” Clair stuttered. “But he just kept looking at me and saying, ‘It’s elementary dear Clair!’ this and ‘elementary’ that. I was like, ‘I just asked what time it is, jerk.’”
“So what’s the plan?” Shiro asked.
****
“Mr. Shiro, if 5 continues to deny his part in this crime then I believe the best course left is to set him on fire,” Q explained. “Shiro?”
Q looked around. He hadn’t been paying attention to where he was going and he also hadn’t realized that he’d lost the group he was with. “Ah, it seems a proper sleuth can easily lose a crowd. Even by accident.”
Q wandered aimlessly through WOTNOPOLIS looking for his crowd and the criminal. “Where are you guys?” he yelled.
“What would a great detective do in this situation?” Q pondered. “Probably don a disguise.”
“So, Q,” he heard a man say behind him. “It looks like we finally meet.”
“Who are you?” Q asked the man who stood before him.
“I’m the one who’s been kidnapping the people all over WOTNOPOLIS!” he cackled.
“No way!” Q cried out. “You mean I solved the case? Wow! I’m so impressed with myself I’m not even sure what I did.”
“No, you didn’t? I revealed myself to you?” the man corrected.
“Woo! Never doubt the great detective Q!” he yelled.
“You didn’t solve anything!” he sighed. “Do you want your friends back or not? You know I have Knssquad right now.”
“Hey, let her go,” Q said.
“What? No,” he blinked. “You’re not getting how this works. I have all the power right now. So listen up, buddy.”
“I’m Kai!” he yelled.
“Kai? Kai! Kai!?” Q yelled in horror.
“Yes, Kai, I’m-”
“Kai!? Holy, you can’t be, I mean, Kai!? Since, how, Kai!”
“You’re going a little overboard here,” Kai rolled his eyes.
“Have we met before, though?” Q asked. “Sorry, I don’t normally forget a face or name, well, yeah, but you’re not ringing any bells.”
“I had a tiny piece of the story,” Kai mumbled. “And I was forgotten. Discarded into the names of people no longer needed in WOTNOPOLIS. And I decided, enough is enough! I’m getting my chance in the spotlight. And I’ll do it by getting rid of any characters I need to.”
“Whoa, that’s evil,” Q stared at him.
“Evil? It’s justice! I’m going to be the god of this world. Nay, I’m going to be the author of this world! No more characters who don’t deserve lots of time in the story getting it. Bringing Destinykil back three times yet giving me five minutes in the show? No more glorifying demons! Seriously, all the awesome characters have demons inside them; what kind of message does that send to the kids? And no more overused Cherry Coke jokes!” Kai laughed. “This story is going to be changed! I’m creating a newer, better story where I will be the author. All who stand in my way, any character who got a bigger part than me, shall be removed!”
“You may have kidnapped my friends, which happens a lot in WOTNOPOLIS,” Q started. “And you may have insulted the ethics of this story, or the fact that we like keeping characters around longer than they could have. So what if Amaterasu is now working towards redemption after he was a total jerk? Maybe we like that. But how dare you attack our soda jokes!”
Q’s fist smashed into Kai’s face and sent him flying. “Katawatachoo.”
“Ah, Q, you totally ruined it,” Bano shook his head. “You sounded kind of awesome when you totally got more upset over soda than your friends. But that catchphrase will never be cool. Just give up.”
“You’ll never be cool but you haven’t given up,” Q muttered as he watched several people walk out.
“So wait, what happened?” Q asked as he looked at Yoyo, Clair, Bano, and Shiro.
“We decided that you were being really annoying so you’d make good murder bait. We wanted to murder you so why wouldn’t a real murderer?” Yoyo smiled.
“Aha!” Q nodded. “And you guys got here just in time to witness me catch the crook.”
“You did! And it was great!” Q heard several policemen cheer.
“I think I need some time off,” Shiro shook his head.
Little Shiro read the names off his clipboard. “Toshii, Jz, Zergio, Zakku,” Little Shiro rattled on. “Renden, Briex.”
“That’s not that many names,” KKQ said. “Are you sure it’s not just all coincidence?”
“That all these people have gone missing in the span of two days? Maybe it is. Some of these people we don’t really know where they are on a normal day,” Shiro said. “But the fact that they were reported missing is strange.”
“Hm,” KKQ mulled over the matter as she ate a muffin.
“These disappearances are happening all over the city, though,” Shiro said. “Which makes it less likely that they are linked.”
“Well,” KKQ smiled. “Don’t go missing, Shiro!”
“I’ll try not to,” Shiro laughed as he watched her leave the office. He studied the chart a while longer. He felt like there was something he was missing and if they didn’t find out soon they’d be in trouble.
****
“Turn up the news,” the Eagle gang yelled as they gathered around the TV sitting in the bar. “It’s Shadowed Gless!”
“Woo!” Yoyo cheered as she got comfy. “The best reporter in WOTNOPOLIS.”
“Today we’re looking deeper into the WOTNOPOLIS disappearances,” SG said as she looked into the camera. “What began as a few disappearances has exploded in size. The following people have been reported missing in the past few hours: Peinq, Reshii, Crispin, and Darnas. It is beginning to seem like no one is safe.”
“Wow,” Q said. “I didn’t really expect all of those guys to go missing. This is getting pretty serious.”
“Screw Darnas, he’s been missing ever since I kicked his butt in that fight,” Yoyo shrugged. “Next they’ll say Destinykil is missing.”
“Yeah. Isn’t it kind of creepy that the people Yoyo fights go missing afterward?” Bano asked.
The door to the bar flew open and Dark Raptor stared at them. “Yo,” Q said. “What’s up? Here to kill me or something?”
“That plotline was already resolved. Don’t you pay attention? I’m busy being awesome right now,” Dark Raptor rolled his eyes. “But that’s not why I’m here.”
“If you’re here to watch SG she’s already started her segment,” Bano pointed out.
“That’s not it!” Dark Raptor yelled. “My gang! Everyone in my gang went missing.”
“Are you sure they’re not just trying to get away from you?” Yoyo asked.
Dark Raptor glared at them. “No! Someone took out my gang and now they’re all gone. Peinq, Toshii, Reshii! My entire gang. And I think I’m next!”
“Why do you think you’re next?” Bano said.
“Because!” Dark Raptor said. “Well, I don’t know. But I’m the loveable little brother so why not me?”
“You’re not loveable. If someone decides to kill you then you probably deserve it,” Q said.
“Oh come on, guys,” Dark Raptor said. “I’m scared here.”
Temari patted DR on the back and sighed. “Fine, we’ll help you out.”
“We will?” Bano asked. Dark Raptor looked at him sorrowfully.
“I mean, yeah, we will,” Bano shrugged. “Oiy, just leave it to us.”
“You‘re with us, Dark Raptor,” Q smiled. “Even though you’re a real pain, you’ll be back with your gang again tomorrow. We‘ll find a way to make sure it happens. Or if tomorrow‘s not good sometime soon-ish.”
“If they’re not dead,” Yoyo pointed out.
“Thanks a lot guys,” Dark Raptor smiled. “I feel better.”
“Good. Now go away, Sg’s on,” Q shoo’d him with his hand.
“By the way, where’s Cherry Coke?” Dark Raptor asked.
****
Cops from all over WOTNOPOLIS had been gathered together for a meeting inside the Police Headquarters. What was different about this meeting is that it wasn’t only for the police management teams but also the lower level members.
“Hello,” Endless Nothing spoke as he looked at the audience of cop personnel inside the large, dark room. “I’m sure you’ve all heard by now about the sudden string of disappearances. There’s been no clue to who the killer is so we’re calling in an expert detective. He’ll be creating a special team so if you make the cut, good for you.”
Endless Nothing leapt off the stage and caught the edge railing of a hovering helicopter. He pulled himself into the helicopter as it flew away from the scene. “Wow, that was oddly dramatic, even for him,” Shiro noted.
When Shiro saw the person pushing a big TV connected to a video tape he couldn’t help but roll his eyes. “What is Dark Raptor doing here?” he sighed.
After several minutes of playing with the wires a letter popped up on the screen: Q. “Hello, gentleman, I am a robot sent from the future to help you catch the criminal.”
“Freaking awesome!” Shiro heard someone shout.
“No way. That can’t be a robot. But I wonder who he really is?” Shiro heard another person question.
“Oh come on, you don’t know?” Shiro turned and found himself face to face with KKQ. “I expected better from you, Sergeant.”
“I’ve already deduced several things. Quit moving the freaking flashcard with the Q on it while I’m making a dramatic speech Yoyo! If you can hold up two swords against Destinykil I’d think you could at least hold a speech card!” the robot from the future grumbled.
“You just said my name! You’ve completely blown our cover!” Yoyo screamed at Q.
“Mih, we’ll bleep it out in editing or something. The post production staff will take care of it, anyway,” Q mumbled. “Gentleman! I’d like to let you know that I’ve already made great progress on this case and am thankful that you’re allowing me to dive into Police funds and forces to help solve it and find my dog-”
“That explains his motivation,” Shiro rolled his eyes. “How did the mayor get tricked by this?”
“He’s already made great progress? Just what you’d expect from a pro like Q!” Shiro heard someone shout from behind him. He dared not look in case it was KKQ again.
“I have deduced that the mysterious disappearances happened in WOTNOPOLIS. Thus it is very likely that this was an inside job. That’s right. A WOTNOPOLIS citizen most likely played a hand in what happened. Now gentleman, it’s far too late to rule out a vast research facility creating zombies, Alien abductions, or foreigners poaching our citizens for sport, but I do believe a WOTNOPOLIS citizen played a hand in this! Or at least someone who’s been to WOTNOPOLIS recently”
“Really? But WOTNOPOLIS citizens are such models to the community!”
Shiro’s forehead was turning red from all the thorough face palms he’d done so far. He wasn’t sure who the people were in the police force but he could tell why they’d never made it to the upper echelon meetings.
“That’s all I am sharing with you for the time being! But we will be setting up an office soon and be taking care of your resources. I have our first suspect, by the way. We’re bringing in 5 for questioning and hours of water-boarding and other forms of torture. It is far too early for me to divulge why I think he’s the suspect but believe me, he needs to be tortured. Rest not, police of WOTNOPOLIS. This city is in good hands.”
“Don’t you mean rest well? Bah, forget it, cut the camera alre-”
Shiro groaned as he watched Dark Raptor push the cart away without unplugging the TV. He wasn’t sure which was worse. The presentation or the fact that Dark Raptor just kept pushing the cart like the TV hadn’t just fallen off and smashed to pieces.
****
Knssquad quietly baked cookies. She knew the gang was off searching for clues but she was in a cookie baking mood. What she hadn’t expected was the power to go out at that very moment.
“Great, it’s really dark,” Knssquad mumbled. She peeped out the window and frowned. “Odd. Why does the power only seem to be out on this block? Particularly, this spot.”
A loud creaking noise from the back of the bar made her straighten up immediately. “Temari? Cherry Coke? Are one of you guys back there, I can’t see right now?” Knssquad called out.
Her worry heightened as she heard no one answer from the dark. “Hello?” Knssquad whimpered. “You know, I used to make fun of it in horror movies, but I suddenly have the strong urge to go into the basement.”
A strong arm grabbed her shoulder and she immediately sent the person flying back into the darkness. “Take my exploding cookies of death!” Knssquad screamed as she launched the cookie pan into the man’s face.
“Hey, those didn’t explode?” the man questioned but Knssquad repeatedly kicked the cookie pan into his face.
“I already have exploding apples and exploding cookies would just be sorta silly and redundant,” Knssquad said. “And bad for your teeth.”
“Stop attacking me! I’m not here to hurt you. I was sneaking in here because I’m kind of being followed and I thought it was the murderer. I was looking for some help, you see,” the man stuttered. The power came back on and Knssquad realized who she’d been beating. She continued to wail on him harder afterward.
“Stop! Blah. It’s me, Amaterasu!” he shouted.
“I know, that’s why I’m hitting you harder,” Knssquad grumbled as she tossed him out the back door of the bar and shut it.
“What? Look, I know I shot you, but you have to let that go!” Amaterasu said as he pounded desperately on the door.
“Do not, do not!” Knssquad shouted back. “I checked and being shot is something that you are perfectly fine to keep a grudge against someone till you’ve shot them back.”
Amaterasu grew quiet for a moment. “So you’re planning-”
“Oh yes. I will shoot you,” Knssquad smiled gleefully. “And it will hurt.”
“Maybe I’m better off with the murderer,” Amaterasu mumbled. The power went out and Knssquad heard him scream.
“No! Okay! I’m not! Come on, let me in, please?” Amaterasu begged.
Knssquad opened the door and smiled. “But isn’t it your daughter’s birthday today? Weren’t you supposed to give her a present?”
“Eh, what the heck are you doing? If you say something like that my chances of living are drastically decreased!” Amaterasu pleaded.
“I know,” Knssquad grinned. “And you were also going to meet that girl you haven’t seen in ten years. And show her the locket you never let go of.”
“Stop! Stop! You’re killing me! Don’t listen to her, fate! These are lies!”
“Plus you’ve just put away your crazy evil side and are trying to right the wrongs of your past and help the good guys!” Knssquad shouted.
“Oh shoot. That one’s the worst sign of my imminent death and it’s true,” Amaterasu stuttered.
“You’re a goner, buddy,” Knssquad laughed.
She listened for more signs of his pleading but none came. “I guess I could let you in, though, if you buy me pizza. Your treating. Hm? Amaterasu? Amaterasu?”
She opened the back door of the bar and felt a feeling of unease overcome her. “Oh shoot, what happened?” she whispered.
“The same thing that will happen to you.”
****
“So, where’d you get the pipe there, Q?” Yoyo asked.
Q pulled the lead pipe out of his mouth and shrugged. “Over there by that drainage. I don’t really see how pipes help you think as a detective,” he said as he tossed it. Yoyo slowly shook her head in disbelief as it banged noisily against the ground.
“Wow, can you believe the great detective Q is helping us with this case?” Shiro heard a police officer mutter behind his back.
“You freaking idiots! It’s the same Q we chase after on a daily base. If anything, he’s acting dumber than normal! Quit treating him like a super star or like he’s someone else, please!” Shiro griped.
“Shiro, you shouldn’t be upset just because you feel inadequate around someone as great as Q. We’re not expecting you to live up to his standards,” the man walking with Shiro spoke up.
“Oh shut up Tea Cup Holding Character. Don’t you start with me, too,” Shiro said as he marched over to Q. “Any leads yet, oh great detective?” he asked him.
“This is one incredibly tricky case,” Q muttered. “Many different people from many different backgrounds disappearing fast. What is our man after? Is he just a random person snatching killing machine or is there some link we haven’t found? The questions are endless as we hunt for the truth in a world of grey.”
Shiro took the sunglasses off his face and smacked him with him. “Colors have returned to our dark and dreary world!” Q shouted.
Shiro looked over at Bano, Clair, and Yoyo and sighed. “Why are you putting up with this idiot? He’s worse than usual.”
“Yeah, well, it was really bad, but Dark Raptor came up with a great plan for both catching the crook and possibly killing Q,” Yoyo smiled.
“At first I thought it was cruel,” Clair stuttered. “But he just kept looking at me and saying, ‘It’s elementary dear Clair!’ this and ‘elementary’ that. I was like, ‘I just asked what time it is, jerk.’”
“So what’s the plan?” Shiro asked.
****
“Mr. Shiro, if 5 continues to deny his part in this crime then I believe the best course left is to set him on fire,” Q explained. “Shiro?”
Q looked around. He hadn’t been paying attention to where he was going and he also hadn’t realized that he’d lost the group he was with. “Ah, it seems a proper sleuth can easily lose a crowd. Even by accident.”
Q wandered aimlessly through WOTNOPOLIS looking for his crowd and the criminal. “Where are you guys?” he yelled.
“What would a great detective do in this situation?” Q pondered. “Probably don a disguise.”
“So, Q,” he heard a man say behind him. “It looks like we finally meet.”
“Who are you?” Q asked the man who stood before him.
“I’m the one who’s been kidnapping the people all over WOTNOPOLIS!” he cackled.
“No way!” Q cried out. “You mean I solved the case? Wow! I’m so impressed with myself I’m not even sure what I did.”
“No, you didn’t? I revealed myself to you?” the man corrected.
“Woo! Never doubt the great detective Q!” he yelled.
“You didn’t solve anything!” he sighed. “Do you want your friends back or not? You know I have Knssquad right now.”
“Hey, let her go,” Q said.
“What? No,” he blinked. “You’re not getting how this works. I have all the power right now. So listen up, buddy.”
“I’m Kai!” he yelled.
“Kai? Kai! Kai!?” Q yelled in horror.
“Yes, Kai, I’m-”
“Kai!? Holy, you can’t be, I mean, Kai!? Since, how, Kai!”
“You’re going a little overboard here,” Kai rolled his eyes.
“Have we met before, though?” Q asked. “Sorry, I don’t normally forget a face or name, well, yeah, but you’re not ringing any bells.”
“I had a tiny piece of the story,” Kai mumbled. “And I was forgotten. Discarded into the names of people no longer needed in WOTNOPOLIS. And I decided, enough is enough! I’m getting my chance in the spotlight. And I’ll do it by getting rid of any characters I need to.”
“Whoa, that’s evil,” Q stared at him.
“Evil? It’s justice! I’m going to be the god of this world. Nay, I’m going to be the author of this world! No more characters who don’t deserve lots of time in the story getting it. Bringing Destinykil back three times yet giving me five minutes in the show? No more glorifying demons! Seriously, all the awesome characters have demons inside them; what kind of message does that send to the kids? And no more overused Cherry Coke jokes!” Kai laughed. “This story is going to be changed! I’m creating a newer, better story where I will be the author. All who stand in my way, any character who got a bigger part than me, shall be removed!”
“You may have kidnapped my friends, which happens a lot in WOTNOPOLIS,” Q started. “And you may have insulted the ethics of this story, or the fact that we like keeping characters around longer than they could have. So what if Amaterasu is now working towards redemption after he was a total jerk? Maybe we like that. But how dare you attack our soda jokes!”
Q’s fist smashed into Kai’s face and sent him flying. “Katawatachoo.”
“Ah, Q, you totally ruined it,” Bano shook his head. “You sounded kind of awesome when you totally got more upset over soda than your friends. But that catchphrase will never be cool. Just give up.”
“You’ll never be cool but you haven’t given up,” Q muttered as he watched several people walk out.
“So wait, what happened?” Q asked as he looked at Yoyo, Clair, Bano, and Shiro.
“We decided that you were being really annoying so you’d make good murder bait. We wanted to murder you so why wouldn’t a real murderer?” Yoyo smiled.
“Aha!” Q nodded. “And you guys got here just in time to witness me catch the crook.”
“You did! And it was great!” Q heard several policemen cheer.
“I think I need some time off,” Shiro shook his head.
