by WOTNOPOLIS 23
“Food is for eating; not for playing,” Knssquad’s mother told her as she watched the young girl throw it across the room. “When will you learn that?”
“Whatever, can I go outside now, mom?” Knssquad begged her mother. She had been waiting to go out and play all day.
“Alright, fine,” Knssquad’s mother shook her head. “But remember to be back before it gets dark! And be careful.”
Knssquad rushed outside. She loved playing out in the street. She looked both ways down the street as she searched for her friends. She jumped with joy when she saw them standing in a huddle across the street.
“Hey!” Knssquad yelled as she raced over to them. “What’s up everyone?”
“Knssquad!” the group cheered. A young girl turned and saluted Knssquad. “We are the army rangers, now! We’re here to protect this street from any harm! If you see a villain you are to report him to me.”
Knssquad saluted back, “Aye, general! I haven’t seen any villains yet.”
The girl in the center of the group of kids waved her hands up and down. “Good! We noble people have been called to a great duty. This jewel of a city is our home,” she said as she crawled on top of a mailbox. “And we will always protect it with our life. We will always protect her. And the best way to do that is to be the best possible citizen you can be. I know when I grow up I’m going to be such a role model.”
“We all know you will be, Titan!” Knssquad cheered. “They’ll have statues of you across the city! They’ll probably even give you the key to the city.”
Titanium jumped down from the mailbox and looked at Knssquad closely. “Want to hear a secret everyone?”
The group of kids leaned in with eyes wide. “Yeah!”
“Okay, you can’t tell anyone this,” Titan winked. “But I heard that this city has several keys! And there are several people looking for them because there’s a monster that lives under the city.”
“No, you saw that on Tv,” another girl spoke up. She quietly munched on a muffin in the back and shook her head. “I saw that, too!”
Titan blushed with embarrassment and laughed. “Well, KKQ is right, I did see that on Tv. But the monster under the city part is true.”
“Sounds scary,” someone spoke up.
Titan immediately pointed at the kid and laughed. “Never fear! For we will protect you and this city’s inhabitants from danger. By the way, KKQ, you love muffins so much I think you should grow up and marry a muffin man.”
KKQ blushed and hid behind Knssquad. “Don’t worry,” Knssquad comforted her. “I bet the Muffin man will be extremely powerful and will protect you from danger.”
“Assistant-general,” Titan pointed. “Aren’t you forgetting? Today’s the day of our challenge.”
Knssquad shook her had and made a fist with her left hand. “I didn’t forget! Today’s the day where we prove which of us is the fastest of WOTNOPOLIS. Today’s the match that decides it all!”
“I mean no offense Assistant-General, but you’re going down!” Titan declared.
Everyone gasped. “Wow, so tough,” KKQ whispered.
Moments later the two of them were mounted on their scooters. KKQ was so nervous she couldn’t eat her muffin as she watched the two girls line up. “Did you remember the secret to speed?” Titan asked Knssquad.
“I remember,” Knssquad shouted. “Never ride on the road! For that’s where the cars are and they’ll only get in your way. Make your own roads. That is fate.”
Titan blew her nose into some tissues and smiled back. “Your truly my greatest apprentice, Knssquad. I have no intention of letting you win today, but if you beat me. Well, I think it’ll be okay.”
****
Clair wondered around the bar aimlessly. The past few days had been spent with the group recuperating from their injuries and she was getting a bit restless. Bano had done nothing but sleep and Knssquad had done nothing but eat. Yoyo, once she had woken up, had done nothing but sit in the corner of the bar cleaning her sword and staring at her new sword.
“I like it,” Yoyo whispered as she cleaned it off. “Mine. It is precious to me.”
She had been doing that for hours. Clair was starting to get creeped out by it. KKQ had mistakenly left Destinykil’s sword here with Yoyo believing it to be hers. Since Yoyo didn’t have a sword she had decided to keep it. What had at first seemed to be Yoyo playing a joke had continued for quite a while now. Clair ignored it. It had gotten Yoyo’s mind off wanting to find Destinykil in a hospital and take his finger to make up for the one she lost.
“Need something to drink?” Temari asked Clair. Clair shook her head no. Clair loved Temari but she had been asking her that a lot lately. Clair needed to get out of the bar.
“Hey, where’s Q?” Clair asked.
“Q went out to get a cherry coke a few hours ago,” Temari said as she set out the dog’s food bowl. Cherry Coke barked at the mention of his name. “He said something about a special 3 litre cherry coke being sold that he had to have.”
“Of course,” Clair said. “Why didn’t he take me?”
Temari laughed. “Could be because you all hurt his feelings by attacking his beloved soda the other day?”
“Hey,” Clair countered. “He was the one trying to kill Yoyo.”
“But no one will kill me now, will they precious?” Yoyo grinned. “No sir. Them nasty boys’s will not hurt us.”
“Shut up!” Clair snapped.
****
“Yo,” Q shouted as he entered the store. “I’ve been to six stores already! Do you have the special custom made 3 liter cherry coke!”
“No,” the man answered. “This is a car dealership. What the heck are you doing?”
“Crap,” Q said as he left. “I figured all the cars outside the place were there because they all wanted the soda.”
Q wondered across the street and walked inside the convenient store. “Yo,” Q shouted. “I’ve been to seven stores already! Do you have the custom made 3 liter cherry coke!”
“Yeah,” a cashier said. “I think we got some. It was more of a joke our manager played on us, because he knew no one would buy it, though.”
“Yes!” Q yelled. “Where is it?”
“Try the Soda aisle, aisle 14?” the cashier asked.
Q raced toward the aisle. “Aisle 14,” Q said as he spun past a grandma with her kid. “Out of the way!”
Q looked up and down the aisle. “3 liter cherry coke. 3 liter cherry coke. 3 liter, aha!”
Q reached out for the cherry coke and pulled it out. “The rare and limited once in a life time 3 liter cherry coke! An extra liter of deliciousness!” Q and another man shouted.
Q looked down at the soda bottle and realized another hand was on it. “Hey,” Q glared. “That’s my bottle of deliciousness! Get your hands off.”
“No way! That’s the last bottle and I’ve been to four stores looking for it,” the man shouted. “It’s mine!”
“I’ve been to seven stores!” Q declared.
“I lied, I meant to say fourteen stores,” the other man shook his head.
“I lied too, I also meant to say seventeen stores,” Q pushed back.
“How many of them were car dealerships, though?” the other man asked.
“Only 3!” Q said.
“Hah, I went to five, I clearly won!” the man said as he pulled the 3 liter. “Give it.”
“No,” Q said as he pulled it back. “You give it.”
“You’re clearly not worthy! You should know a cherry coke must be handled with care. All this pulling will make it fizzy and lose its worth!” the man yelled as he pulled it.
“Then set it down on the ground,” Q said. Both men crouched down toward the ground. “Now let go.”
Both stared at the other. “You’re not letting go,” Q said.
“You first,” the other man commented.
“It was my idea, I go second.”
“That’s never happened in history!” the man said.
Q pulled out his wallet and handed the man ten dollars. “Here, get several 2 liters and we call it even.”
The man handed Q the ten dollar bill. “Here, get a few 2 liters and we’ll call it even.”
“What the heck! That was my line!” Q shouted.
“Yeah, and it was stupid. We both came for the special once in a life time 3 liter and that’s that,” the man said. “You know I’m a dangerous man.”
Q laughed. “Pfft, I doubt you’re more dangerous than me.”
“Yeah right,” the man said. “I’ve been all over the news lately. I’m the wanted man, 5.”
“5? What the heck kind of a name is that?” Q asked. “Who goes by a number for a name! That’s just silly. Now me? I’m the wanted Q.”
“Q? That’s just stupid. What, your parents couldn’t think of a full name for you so they just picked a letter randomly?” 5 asked. “Geez, how ridiculous.”
Q got in the man’s face. “I’m a wanted gangster, you know.”
5 laughed. “A gangster? Please. I’m a thug. Not just any thug. The leader of the Hawk’s, Thug. We’re kind of famous right now since we just defeated one of the four crime syndicates of WOTNOPOLIS while being chased by the enforcers. If you don‘t wanna be caught in my wrath you better let go.”
Q glared at 5. “Gangsters are greater than thugs. Everyone knows that.”
“You take that back!” 5 yelled. “You’re certainly not worthy of this soda now.”
“I need this,” Q whined as he tugged at the 3 liter. “My gang has been really down lately. I know if I drink this they’ll be so happy for me it’ll cheer them up.”
“I need it more!” 5 said. “One of my members is terminally ill and another one is mentally insane. Only this 3 liter will make them happy.”
“Pfft, that’s nothing! One of mine is dead and the other is a demon which is like a voodoo mental illness. And then another one is Bano,” Q said.
“Why would a dead guy need this?” 5 asked.
“It was his dying wish I buy this,” Q said. “Or at least it probably was.”
“Well I just plain want it!” 5 yelled.
“You two!” the cashier said. “You’re scaring the other customers.”
“He’s got his hands all over my soda,” Q yelled.
“It’s my soda!” 5 argued.
The cashier shook his head. “You’re grown men. Figure it out.”
Q sighed. “He’s right. There’s only one way to figure this out.”
5 agreed and stood up. “Last man standing gets the soda.”
“No way!” the cashier yelled. “You’re not fighting in my store.”
“He’s right,” Q said. “The cherry coke could be spilled if you’re not careful. There’s another way, but I don’t recommend it.”
“Hm?” 5 asked. “What do you suggest?”
“We each get 5 Dr. Pepper bottles, which is 5 a piece, and then we drink the 5 and if you can drink all 5 then you get it?” Q said.
“Quit saying 5 over and over again. I know you’re just doing that because it’s my name,” 5 snapped. “And Dr. Pepper? That stuff is disgusting.”
“Pfft. Coward,” Q smiled.
“I’ll show you,” 5 yelled as he grabbed a 2 liter and began to drink it.
Q watched as 5 fell to the ground and coughed. “Heh, 21 flavors and all of them suck. A real test of manliness and cherry coke worthiness can only be this. But you won’t stomach it.”
5 glared at Q and stood back up. He pointed at the Dr. Pepper bottle with a little less in it and smiled. “Oh, I’m doing this.”
“Are you planning to pay for this?” the cashier asked as he watched the two of them pull down Dr. Pepper bottles.
“Probably with our lives,” Q and 5 shouted back at the cashier.
****
“Boss!” Crispi said as she ran into the room. “The Eagle gang did it! They defeated the fourth Mafia.”
“Hm?” Mikel asked in surprise.
“It’s true! They took them out a few days ago,” Crispi smiled.
“Hm!” Mikel yelled as he jumped up.
“Well I was going to tell you but I started watching Tv and lost track of time an-”
“Hm!” Mikel snapped.
“Fine, no excuses. Anyway, the first Mafia hasn’t moved, but the second Mafia is up to something. They’ve started moving vans around the city. We’re not sure where they are going or what’s in them, but they’re definitely up to something,” Crispi said.
Mikel wondered out the door of the small shack. Their little hideout lay at the top of a hill several miles from into the rural district. He didn’t know why but he had a bad feeling about anything the second Mafia did. “Hm,” Mikel said as he looked around their base.
“Really? You want to bring our troops back from their duties?” Cris asked. “That’s a bit extreme considering we don’t know anything, yet.”
Mikel continued to stare out over the hill towards the city. The skyscrapers of WOTNOPOLIS didn’t look so big from this distance. Even TFK’s mighty tower seemed small. Mikel preferred it like that. Having all those giant buildings looming over him annoyed him. He never knew who was watching him from those windows.
“You still want me to get everyone, huh?” Cris asked as she watched her boss stare at the city.
“Mhm,” Mikel answered.
****
Q couldn’t see straight anymore. He held the nearly empty container of Dr. Pepper in his hands and could feel his strength failing. “Just one more sip,” Q thought.
“Hah, I told you that you couldn’t do it,” 5 laughed as he lay down on the ground. He picked his bottle up and chugged the rest of his bottle and threw it in the air. The pain of the battle was over and the victor decided.
Q swallowed the last of his bottle and threw it on the ground. “I-I did it,” Q said as he collapsed into the ground. His head pounded. Pain was circulating out from his stomach. “I finished one bottle.”
5’s laughter turned to tears. “We have four more to go,” 5 whined. “I hate this!”
Q cried too. “This was such a stupid idea we had.”
“I hate us!” 5 yelled.
“I hate you, too!” Q shouted.
Q and 5 looked at each other. They pushed back their tears and laughed. Their laughs echoed through the store as the cashier got the store manager to take care of them. “I think!” Q yelled as he grabbed the bottle of cherry coke. “That we should split this cherry coke. We both fought valiantly!”
“I think!” 5 said as he grabbed the bottle. “That is a great idea.”
“Cool,” Q said as he tugged at the bottle. “So just let it go and I’ll take a sip then you take a sip.”
5 didn’t let go and laughed slowly. “Now hold on partner. How big are these sips we’re taking?”
“Um, normal sized, how big were you planning to make them?” Q tugged at the bottle harder.
“Maybe I should go first,” 5 said. “Then you’ll see how big my sip is and yours will be that size, too.”
Q glared at 5. “Let go of the bottle.”
“You first,” 5 said.
****
“Geez,” Q said as he walked down the street away from the convenient store. “Can you believe the nerve of that guy?”
“I know,” 5 said. “Throwing us out of the store because we’re a ‘nuisance.’”
“We were valued customers!” Q said. “Back in my day customers were treated with a little more respect.”
“Mhm, you said it,” 5 nodded.
“So,” Q said as he looked back at 5. “I, I guess this is goodbye, huh?”
5 looked down at the sidewalk. “Yeah, this is goodbye.”
Q looked away. “Will, well, will I ever see you again?”
5 grabbed Q by the shoulder. “Q, we had a good time. Let’s just hold onto these memories.”
Q looked at 5 and sighed. “I know. I knew it wasn‘t going to last. We‘re too different, you and I. I just, well, I can’t believe it’s over. Maybe we could continue the search for the 3 liter together?”
5 shook his head. “You know we can’t do that. The 3 liter is once in a lifetime, Q. And you’re a gangster. I’m a thug. What would people say?”
“I don’t care about the people!” Q yelled. “I just-”
Q bit his lip and looked down. After a moment he smiled. “Let’s work hard to make our dreams come true, okay?”
5 gave Q a thumbs and smiled, too. “Yeah, Q. Let’s do that. You‘ll definitely get the money together to save your family‘s farm. Even with a Bano in your gang.”
Q laughed. “And I know you’ll find your brother and cure him of Rabies. He’s out there somewhere, that Dim Raptor.”
Both turned and walked down the sidewalk. “Yo, 5,” Q said. “If we’re going the same way down the sidewalk it totally ruins the point of that awesome goodbye we just had.”
“Ah, so true,” 5 said. “So go the other way.”
“You go the other way,” Q said. “I started down this path first.”
“No, it was definitely me!” 5 shouted.
“You idiot! My foot was clearly centimeters ahead of yours on that first step. Anyone watching saw it!” Q shouted.
“There’s no way,” 5 said. “I picked up my foot half a second before you did. Quit following me. Stalker! Everyone! This guy’s a stalker! We had a good time at a convenient store and now he’s stalking me!”
“Screw you!” Q yelled. “I wouldn’t stalk you if you were the last guy on the planet.”
****
“Geez, that guy,” Q said as he walked down the street. “Because of him I ended up completely lost.”
Q could hear horns honking behind him but he ignored it. “I like cherry coke. I’m gonna be the best thug in the city. I fight using sonar! Geez, who’d like a guy like that?” Q sighed.
“Get off the road,” Q heard a bullhorn shouting behind him. Q turned around, “I’m not taking up that much room go around me!”
Q rolled his eyes as he stared at the cop car behind him. “Q, it’s illegal to walk down a highway. Especially if I’m on my way to an important meeting,” Little Shiro said.
Q looked around. “Oh, I’m on the super highway,” Q thought. “I guess it did seem like I wasn’t on our normal street.”
“I’m lost!” Q whined back at Little Shiro.
“Haven’t you been in the city for a while now, Q? You’re still getting lost?” Shiro asked from the bullhorn.
“Nicely done!” a voice yelled from above. Q looked up and saw JJDomer dropping from the sky.
“Uh, where’d you come from?” Q asked as the man landed in front of him.
“Don’t worry about that!” JJDomer said. “Good job finding Q, Little Shiro. I’ll take it from here.”
Little Shiro honked his car horn at them and blared the sirens. “No, get out of my way. Really. I’ve got a meeting to go to. The mayor will be there. It’s a big deal.”
“Don’t worry, Little Shiro. I forgive you for letting him get away last time, really,” JJDomer said.
“I don’t have time for this!” Q yelled as he smashed his fist into the highway. He stopped and paused for a moment. “Wait, actually I do. Fine, JJDomer if you want to do this let’s get it over with.”
JJDomer slammed a kick towards Q. He blocked it and smiled as he grabbed the leg and swung it into the ground. JJDomer kicked his other leg into Q’s face as he hit the ground. Q stumbled backward and shook his head. “Not bad, military pain in the butt.”
JJDomer jumped back to his feet and smiled. “Let’s go, Soundy.”
“Get out of my way. Seriously guys,” Little Shiro honked his horn helplessly as the two fought. Q swung his fist at JJDomer. JJDomer glided past it and kicked Q in the side. Q fell back into a different lane of traffic. A horn slammed Q’s ear and he leapt into the air. A car flew underneath Q.
“Heh, nice dodge,” JJDomer said as he back-flipped over a car. The car’s brakes screeched and JJDomer watched as the car flipped onto its side and smashed into a truck.
“Maybe this isn’t our best idea,” JJDomer yelled over at Q.
“It’s not your best idea! This is probably my best idea ever,” Q said.
“What the heck are you talking about, Q?” Little Shiro yelled. “That’s not a comeback.”
“Get in. Both of you. Now,” Little Shiro said as he pointed towards his car. “I’ll take you home, Q.”
The two of them got in the back of Little Shiro’s car and sat down next to each other. The cop car drove past the accidents they had caused. JJDomer and Q looked away from the scene and looked at each other.
“Um,” Q said. “Sitting next to the guy who just dropped out of nowhere to kill you is kind of awkward.”
“Shut up,” Little Shiro said. “You’re getting a free ride home.”
“Little Shiro, merge lanes now,” JJDomer said.
“I’m trying but it’s not clear,” Little Shiro motioned his hands toward the busy lanes.
“But now! You gotta go now!” JJDomer persisted.
Little Shiro merged and the car behind them swerved into the median. “Look what you made me do!”
“It was fine,” JJDomer shrugged.
“No it wasn’t!” Little Shiro said as he ran his head across his forehead.
“Are you guys seeing that?” Q asked as he pointed out the rear of the cop car.
Both men turned around and looked out the back of the cop car. “Wow,” JJDomer mused.
“Yeah, that‘s different,” Little Shiro commented as he pulled off the exit. Q stared at the mass of white vans behind them. “They seem to be headed out of the city.”
“Yep,” Q said as he turned around in his seat. “Oh well. I bet there will be more parking spots open.”
“That’s what you’re thinking right now?” Little Shiro rolled his eyes. “Did you really take down the fourth Mafia.”
“I almost didn’t, thanks to someone trying to stop me,” Q stared at JJDomer.
JJDomer looked around. “Oh, yeah, that. I thought maybe you’d forgotten about that. Shiro merge!”
****
“Oh, before you go,” Little Shiro said as he dropped Q off in front of the bar. “Hand out these fliers, will ya? I was supposed to do it today but forgot.”
“Eh? Why am I doing your work?” Q asked. “And don’t you have a meeting to go to?”
“Just do it. And oh-“ Little Shiro said as he sped off. Q looked down at the fliers and opened the door of the bar.
“Q, you’re back,” Clair said. “Did you get the cherry coke?”
“Nope,” Q said as he slammed a piece of paper onto a table. Clair looked at him in shock.
“You didn’t get cherry coke?” she asked again.
“No,” Q said as he shoved Bano off the table he was sleeping on. “Everyone! I have our next assignment.”
Everyone looked at the man yelling in the bar. “We’re going to do a 5 K run for charity!”
“Why on Earth would we do that?” Yoyo asked. “No. No. I vote no. I don‘t run for fun.”
“Aren’t those things usually really early in the morning? Heck no,” Bano said.
“I think our team name should b-” Yoyo thwacked Q with her sword handle before he said it.
“We just said we’re not doing it. Listen to us you moronic man,” Yoyo yelled.
“Where’d you hear about a 5 K run?” Knssquad asked.
“After that stupid 5 guy got me kicked out of the store, the cops gave me a ride home away from the van army. Little Shiro wanted me to pass out fliers. I kind of just dropped them on the ground but then I read one and it sounded fun,” Q said.
Yoyo took a seat and pulled at her hair. “That story hurt my head.”
“When is it?” Clair asked.
“We’re not doing it. That’s final,” Yoyo said.
“Tomorrow,” Q said. “The grand prize is a thousand dollars.”
“Guys! Training begins right now! We’re not getting those 4 minute mile times if you don’t hustle!” Yoyo shouted.
“You know maybe it’s not such a bad idea. If it’s for charity and all,” Bano said. “I guess I can do something for the kids.”
Knssquad shook her head. “Bano that was almost as transparent as Yoyo. But what would I need the money for?”
“We’re gonna build a statue to Jake out of it! It will be made of quarters and seventy stories high,” Q said.
“Oh!” Knssquad cheered. “Can it dance, too?”
“Absolutely! And with glowing red eyes it will remind us all of the Jake we knew,” Q nodded.
“That sounds nothing like Jake,” Yoyo interjected.
“It should be able to burn things with the eyes. That way when people walk by it their hearts will be set on fire like Jake set our hearts ablaze!” Knssquad continued.
“Definitely! It will shoot love out of it’s eyes. Fiery love!” Q finished.
“Yeah, that’s definitely a giant killer robot. We’re not spending the money on a giant killer robot,” Yoyo shook her head. “We’re spending it on cookies.”
“We should use the money to get a big bed,” Bano thought. “I’d just lay there and life would be grand.”
“Yeah, but I feel like we keep going back to the statue idea,” Q answered.
“No!” Yoyo thwacked Q again. “We all agreed on cookies.”
“Now you’re the one being oblivious,” Bano said. “But it makes sense you’d want to spend your money on baking cookies in a kitchen, woman.”
“You pig-headed idiot! I’d get Temari to make them!” Yoyo shouted.
“Wait, what?” Temari said.
“That’s right, Temari! Bake those cookies and prove to Bano that he’s wrong about women in the kitchen,” Yoyo declared.
“We should make a portable room inside Jakes ear that we can use as a hide out for zombies,” Q said as he drew a stick figure on the table.
“The ear is the first place the zombies will look. Try his fingernails,” Knssquad said.
“Why are you encouraging him, Knssquad?” Bano shook his head. “So, Q? Are we really doing this 5 K?”
“Yep!” Q smiled. “It’ll be fun. A 5 K doesn’t sound that hard.”
Yoyo just groaned. “At least it‘ll probably be safe there. I doubt anyone dangerous would be at a charity 5 K run, even if the prize was a thousand dollars.”
“If only we’d known then what would happen when we went to that 5 K. And the misfortunes that would befall us there,” Q slowly moved his hands in front of Bano‘s face.
“What the heck are you doing?” Bano asked.
“Testing out that line when I tell this story in the future,” Q said. “This 5 K is clearly a bad idea.”
Everyone stared at Q and rolled their eyes. It had been a long day.
****
Mikel hadn’t been able to sleep at all. It was getting late but something was irritating him. He looked over at Cris who had fallen asleep in front of the Tv hours ago. “I know I need to sleep,” Mikel said. “But there’s just something weird going on.”
Mikel listened to Jan remind him he needed to sleep again and how important it was for him. He walked slowly out the door of the shack and looked across the hill. All over it tents had been set up for his gang. He knew they hadn’t loved the idea of returning to the hill. They weren’t going to question orders, though.
“Look, Jan,” Mikel said. “If I feel like something’s messed up how am I supposed to just sleep, hm?”
Jan continued to argue with him and he just shook his head. Maybe he was wrong, he wondered. But he couldn’t shake the feeling that he wasn’t. He gave one last look out across the hill and decided to call it a night.
As he closed the door to the shack behind him he realized it had gotten very bright inside the small shack. “Hm?” Mikel asked as he looked around.
He looked out the window and saw that a wall of white lights had surrounded the hill. He ran back outside and was greeted by the sound of horns going off. Crispi ran up to Mikel. “We’re under attack!”
“Food is for eating; not for playing,” Knssquad’s mother told her as she watched the young girl throw it across the room. “When will you learn that?”
“Whatever, can I go outside now, mom?” Knssquad begged her mother. She had been waiting to go out and play all day.
“Alright, fine,” Knssquad’s mother shook her head. “But remember to be back before it gets dark! And be careful.”
Knssquad rushed outside. She loved playing out in the street. She looked both ways down the street as she searched for her friends. She jumped with joy when she saw them standing in a huddle across the street.
“Hey!” Knssquad yelled as she raced over to them. “What’s up everyone?”
“Knssquad!” the group cheered. A young girl turned and saluted Knssquad. “We are the army rangers, now! We’re here to protect this street from any harm! If you see a villain you are to report him to me.”
Knssquad saluted back, “Aye, general! I haven’t seen any villains yet.”
The girl in the center of the group of kids waved her hands up and down. “Good! We noble people have been called to a great duty. This jewel of a city is our home,” she said as she crawled on top of a mailbox. “And we will always protect it with our life. We will always protect her. And the best way to do that is to be the best possible citizen you can be. I know when I grow up I’m going to be such a role model.”
“We all know you will be, Titan!” Knssquad cheered. “They’ll have statues of you across the city! They’ll probably even give you the key to the city.”
Titanium jumped down from the mailbox and looked at Knssquad closely. “Want to hear a secret everyone?”
The group of kids leaned in with eyes wide. “Yeah!”
“Okay, you can’t tell anyone this,” Titan winked. “But I heard that this city has several keys! And there are several people looking for them because there’s a monster that lives under the city.”
“No, you saw that on Tv,” another girl spoke up. She quietly munched on a muffin in the back and shook her head. “I saw that, too!”
Titan blushed with embarrassment and laughed. “Well, KKQ is right, I did see that on Tv. But the monster under the city part is true.”
“Sounds scary,” someone spoke up.
Titan immediately pointed at the kid and laughed. “Never fear! For we will protect you and this city’s inhabitants from danger. By the way, KKQ, you love muffins so much I think you should grow up and marry a muffin man.”
KKQ blushed and hid behind Knssquad. “Don’t worry,” Knssquad comforted her. “I bet the Muffin man will be extremely powerful and will protect you from danger.”
“Assistant-general,” Titan pointed. “Aren’t you forgetting? Today’s the day of our challenge.”
Knssquad shook her had and made a fist with her left hand. “I didn’t forget! Today’s the day where we prove which of us is the fastest of WOTNOPOLIS. Today’s the match that decides it all!”
“I mean no offense Assistant-General, but you’re going down!” Titan declared.
Everyone gasped. “Wow, so tough,” KKQ whispered.
Moments later the two of them were mounted on their scooters. KKQ was so nervous she couldn’t eat her muffin as she watched the two girls line up. “Did you remember the secret to speed?” Titan asked Knssquad.
“I remember,” Knssquad shouted. “Never ride on the road! For that’s where the cars are and they’ll only get in your way. Make your own roads. That is fate.”
Titan blew her nose into some tissues and smiled back. “Your truly my greatest apprentice, Knssquad. I have no intention of letting you win today, but if you beat me. Well, I think it’ll be okay.”
****
Clair wondered around the bar aimlessly. The past few days had been spent with the group recuperating from their injuries and she was getting a bit restless. Bano had done nothing but sleep and Knssquad had done nothing but eat. Yoyo, once she had woken up, had done nothing but sit in the corner of the bar cleaning her sword and staring at her new sword.
“I like it,” Yoyo whispered as she cleaned it off. “Mine. It is precious to me.”
She had been doing that for hours. Clair was starting to get creeped out by it. KKQ had mistakenly left Destinykil’s sword here with Yoyo believing it to be hers. Since Yoyo didn’t have a sword she had decided to keep it. What had at first seemed to be Yoyo playing a joke had continued for quite a while now. Clair ignored it. It had gotten Yoyo’s mind off wanting to find Destinykil in a hospital and take his finger to make up for the one she lost.
“Need something to drink?” Temari asked Clair. Clair shook her head no. Clair loved Temari but she had been asking her that a lot lately. Clair needed to get out of the bar.
“Hey, where’s Q?” Clair asked.
“Q went out to get a cherry coke a few hours ago,” Temari said as she set out the dog’s food bowl. Cherry Coke barked at the mention of his name. “He said something about a special 3 litre cherry coke being sold that he had to have.”
“Of course,” Clair said. “Why didn’t he take me?”
Temari laughed. “Could be because you all hurt his feelings by attacking his beloved soda the other day?”
“Hey,” Clair countered. “He was the one trying to kill Yoyo.”
“But no one will kill me now, will they precious?” Yoyo grinned. “No sir. Them nasty boys’s will not hurt us.”
“Shut up!” Clair snapped.
****
“Yo,” Q shouted as he entered the store. “I’ve been to six stores already! Do you have the special custom made 3 liter cherry coke!”
“No,” the man answered. “This is a car dealership. What the heck are you doing?”
“Crap,” Q said as he left. “I figured all the cars outside the place were there because they all wanted the soda.”
Q wondered across the street and walked inside the convenient store. “Yo,” Q shouted. “I’ve been to seven stores already! Do you have the custom made 3 liter cherry coke!”
“Yeah,” a cashier said. “I think we got some. It was more of a joke our manager played on us, because he knew no one would buy it, though.”
“Yes!” Q yelled. “Where is it?”
“Try the Soda aisle, aisle 14?” the cashier asked.
Q raced toward the aisle. “Aisle 14,” Q said as he spun past a grandma with her kid. “Out of the way!”
Q looked up and down the aisle. “3 liter cherry coke. 3 liter cherry coke. 3 liter, aha!”
Q reached out for the cherry coke and pulled it out. “The rare and limited once in a life time 3 liter cherry coke! An extra liter of deliciousness!” Q and another man shouted.
Q looked down at the soda bottle and realized another hand was on it. “Hey,” Q glared. “That’s my bottle of deliciousness! Get your hands off.”
“No way! That’s the last bottle and I’ve been to four stores looking for it,” the man shouted. “It’s mine!”
“I’ve been to seven stores!” Q declared.
“I lied, I meant to say fourteen stores,” the other man shook his head.
“I lied too, I also meant to say seventeen stores,” Q pushed back.
“How many of them were car dealerships, though?” the other man asked.
“Only 3!” Q said.
“Hah, I went to five, I clearly won!” the man said as he pulled the 3 liter. “Give it.”
“No,” Q said as he pulled it back. “You give it.”
“You’re clearly not worthy! You should know a cherry coke must be handled with care. All this pulling will make it fizzy and lose its worth!” the man yelled as he pulled it.
“Then set it down on the ground,” Q said. Both men crouched down toward the ground. “Now let go.”
Both stared at the other. “You’re not letting go,” Q said.
“You first,” the other man commented.
“It was my idea, I go second.”
“That’s never happened in history!” the man said.
Q pulled out his wallet and handed the man ten dollars. “Here, get several 2 liters and we call it even.”
The man handed Q the ten dollar bill. “Here, get a few 2 liters and we’ll call it even.”
“What the heck! That was my line!” Q shouted.
“Yeah, and it was stupid. We both came for the special once in a life time 3 liter and that’s that,” the man said. “You know I’m a dangerous man.”
Q laughed. “Pfft, I doubt you’re more dangerous than me.”
“Yeah right,” the man said. “I’ve been all over the news lately. I’m the wanted man, 5.”
“5? What the heck kind of a name is that?” Q asked. “Who goes by a number for a name! That’s just silly. Now me? I’m the wanted Q.”
“Q? That’s just stupid. What, your parents couldn’t think of a full name for you so they just picked a letter randomly?” 5 asked. “Geez, how ridiculous.”
Q got in the man’s face. “I’m a wanted gangster, you know.”
5 laughed. “A gangster? Please. I’m a thug. Not just any thug. The leader of the Hawk’s, Thug. We’re kind of famous right now since we just defeated one of the four crime syndicates of WOTNOPOLIS while being chased by the enforcers. If you don‘t wanna be caught in my wrath you better let go.”
Q glared at 5. “Gangsters are greater than thugs. Everyone knows that.”
“You take that back!” 5 yelled. “You’re certainly not worthy of this soda now.”
“I need this,” Q whined as he tugged at the 3 liter. “My gang has been really down lately. I know if I drink this they’ll be so happy for me it’ll cheer them up.”
“I need it more!” 5 said. “One of my members is terminally ill and another one is mentally insane. Only this 3 liter will make them happy.”
“Pfft, that’s nothing! One of mine is dead and the other is a demon which is like a voodoo mental illness. And then another one is Bano,” Q said.
“Why would a dead guy need this?” 5 asked.
“It was his dying wish I buy this,” Q said. “Or at least it probably was.”
“Well I just plain want it!” 5 yelled.
“You two!” the cashier said. “You’re scaring the other customers.”
“He’s got his hands all over my soda,” Q yelled.
“It’s my soda!” 5 argued.
The cashier shook his head. “You’re grown men. Figure it out.”
Q sighed. “He’s right. There’s only one way to figure this out.”
5 agreed and stood up. “Last man standing gets the soda.”
“No way!” the cashier yelled. “You’re not fighting in my store.”
“He’s right,” Q said. “The cherry coke could be spilled if you’re not careful. There’s another way, but I don’t recommend it.”
“Hm?” 5 asked. “What do you suggest?”
“We each get 5 Dr. Pepper bottles, which is 5 a piece, and then we drink the 5 and if you can drink all 5 then you get it?” Q said.
“Quit saying 5 over and over again. I know you’re just doing that because it’s my name,” 5 snapped. “And Dr. Pepper? That stuff is disgusting.”
“Pfft. Coward,” Q smiled.
“I’ll show you,” 5 yelled as he grabbed a 2 liter and began to drink it.
Q watched as 5 fell to the ground and coughed. “Heh, 21 flavors and all of them suck. A real test of manliness and cherry coke worthiness can only be this. But you won’t stomach it.”
5 glared at Q and stood back up. He pointed at the Dr. Pepper bottle with a little less in it and smiled. “Oh, I’m doing this.”
“Are you planning to pay for this?” the cashier asked as he watched the two of them pull down Dr. Pepper bottles.
“Probably with our lives,” Q and 5 shouted back at the cashier.
****
“Boss!” Crispi said as she ran into the room. “The Eagle gang did it! They defeated the fourth Mafia.”
“Hm?” Mikel asked in surprise.
“It’s true! They took them out a few days ago,” Crispi smiled.
“Hm!” Mikel yelled as he jumped up.
“Well I was going to tell you but I started watching Tv and lost track of time an-”
“Hm!” Mikel snapped.
“Fine, no excuses. Anyway, the first Mafia hasn’t moved, but the second Mafia is up to something. They’ve started moving vans around the city. We’re not sure where they are going or what’s in them, but they’re definitely up to something,” Crispi said.
Mikel wondered out the door of the small shack. Their little hideout lay at the top of a hill several miles from into the rural district. He didn’t know why but he had a bad feeling about anything the second Mafia did. “Hm,” Mikel said as he looked around their base.
“Really? You want to bring our troops back from their duties?” Cris asked. “That’s a bit extreme considering we don’t know anything, yet.”
Mikel continued to stare out over the hill towards the city. The skyscrapers of WOTNOPOLIS didn’t look so big from this distance. Even TFK’s mighty tower seemed small. Mikel preferred it like that. Having all those giant buildings looming over him annoyed him. He never knew who was watching him from those windows.
“You still want me to get everyone, huh?” Cris asked as she watched her boss stare at the city.
“Mhm,” Mikel answered.
****
Q couldn’t see straight anymore. He held the nearly empty container of Dr. Pepper in his hands and could feel his strength failing. “Just one more sip,” Q thought.
“Hah, I told you that you couldn’t do it,” 5 laughed as he lay down on the ground. He picked his bottle up and chugged the rest of his bottle and threw it in the air. The pain of the battle was over and the victor decided.
Q swallowed the last of his bottle and threw it on the ground. “I-I did it,” Q said as he collapsed into the ground. His head pounded. Pain was circulating out from his stomach. “I finished one bottle.”
5’s laughter turned to tears. “We have four more to go,” 5 whined. “I hate this!”
Q cried too. “This was such a stupid idea we had.”
“I hate us!” 5 yelled.
“I hate you, too!” Q shouted.
Q and 5 looked at each other. They pushed back their tears and laughed. Their laughs echoed through the store as the cashier got the store manager to take care of them. “I think!” Q yelled as he grabbed the bottle of cherry coke. “That we should split this cherry coke. We both fought valiantly!”
“I think!” 5 said as he grabbed the bottle. “That is a great idea.”
“Cool,” Q said as he tugged at the bottle. “So just let it go and I’ll take a sip then you take a sip.”
5 didn’t let go and laughed slowly. “Now hold on partner. How big are these sips we’re taking?”
“Um, normal sized, how big were you planning to make them?” Q tugged at the bottle harder.
“Maybe I should go first,” 5 said. “Then you’ll see how big my sip is and yours will be that size, too.”
Q glared at 5. “Let go of the bottle.”
“You first,” 5 said.
****
“Geez,” Q said as he walked down the street away from the convenient store. “Can you believe the nerve of that guy?”
“I know,” 5 said. “Throwing us out of the store because we’re a ‘nuisance.’”
“We were valued customers!” Q said. “Back in my day customers were treated with a little more respect.”
“Mhm, you said it,” 5 nodded.
“So,” Q said as he looked back at 5. “I, I guess this is goodbye, huh?”
5 looked down at the sidewalk. “Yeah, this is goodbye.”
Q looked away. “Will, well, will I ever see you again?”
5 grabbed Q by the shoulder. “Q, we had a good time. Let’s just hold onto these memories.”
Q looked at 5 and sighed. “I know. I knew it wasn‘t going to last. We‘re too different, you and I. I just, well, I can’t believe it’s over. Maybe we could continue the search for the 3 liter together?”
5 shook his head. “You know we can’t do that. The 3 liter is once in a lifetime, Q. And you’re a gangster. I’m a thug. What would people say?”
“I don’t care about the people!” Q yelled. “I just-”
Q bit his lip and looked down. After a moment he smiled. “Let’s work hard to make our dreams come true, okay?”
5 gave Q a thumbs and smiled, too. “Yeah, Q. Let’s do that. You‘ll definitely get the money together to save your family‘s farm. Even with a Bano in your gang.”
Q laughed. “And I know you’ll find your brother and cure him of Rabies. He’s out there somewhere, that Dim Raptor.”
Both turned and walked down the sidewalk. “Yo, 5,” Q said. “If we’re going the same way down the sidewalk it totally ruins the point of that awesome goodbye we just had.”
“Ah, so true,” 5 said. “So go the other way.”
“You go the other way,” Q said. “I started down this path first.”
“No, it was definitely me!” 5 shouted.
“You idiot! My foot was clearly centimeters ahead of yours on that first step. Anyone watching saw it!” Q shouted.
“There’s no way,” 5 said. “I picked up my foot half a second before you did. Quit following me. Stalker! Everyone! This guy’s a stalker! We had a good time at a convenient store and now he’s stalking me!”
“Screw you!” Q yelled. “I wouldn’t stalk you if you were the last guy on the planet.”
****
“Geez, that guy,” Q said as he walked down the street. “Because of him I ended up completely lost.”
Q could hear horns honking behind him but he ignored it. “I like cherry coke. I’m gonna be the best thug in the city. I fight using sonar! Geez, who’d like a guy like that?” Q sighed.
“Get off the road,” Q heard a bullhorn shouting behind him. Q turned around, “I’m not taking up that much room go around me!”
Q rolled his eyes as he stared at the cop car behind him. “Q, it’s illegal to walk down a highway. Especially if I’m on my way to an important meeting,” Little Shiro said.
Q looked around. “Oh, I’m on the super highway,” Q thought. “I guess it did seem like I wasn’t on our normal street.”
“I’m lost!” Q whined back at Little Shiro.
“Haven’t you been in the city for a while now, Q? You’re still getting lost?” Shiro asked from the bullhorn.
“Nicely done!” a voice yelled from above. Q looked up and saw JJDomer dropping from the sky.
“Uh, where’d you come from?” Q asked as the man landed in front of him.
“Don’t worry about that!” JJDomer said. “Good job finding Q, Little Shiro. I’ll take it from here.”
Little Shiro honked his car horn at them and blared the sirens. “No, get out of my way. Really. I’ve got a meeting to go to. The mayor will be there. It’s a big deal.”
“Don’t worry, Little Shiro. I forgive you for letting him get away last time, really,” JJDomer said.
“I don’t have time for this!” Q yelled as he smashed his fist into the highway. He stopped and paused for a moment. “Wait, actually I do. Fine, JJDomer if you want to do this let’s get it over with.”
JJDomer slammed a kick towards Q. He blocked it and smiled as he grabbed the leg and swung it into the ground. JJDomer kicked his other leg into Q’s face as he hit the ground. Q stumbled backward and shook his head. “Not bad, military pain in the butt.”
JJDomer jumped back to his feet and smiled. “Let’s go, Soundy.”
“Get out of my way. Seriously guys,” Little Shiro honked his horn helplessly as the two fought. Q swung his fist at JJDomer. JJDomer glided past it and kicked Q in the side. Q fell back into a different lane of traffic. A horn slammed Q’s ear and he leapt into the air. A car flew underneath Q.
“Heh, nice dodge,” JJDomer said as he back-flipped over a car. The car’s brakes screeched and JJDomer watched as the car flipped onto its side and smashed into a truck.
“Maybe this isn’t our best idea,” JJDomer yelled over at Q.
“It’s not your best idea! This is probably my best idea ever,” Q said.
“What the heck are you talking about, Q?” Little Shiro yelled. “That’s not a comeback.”
“Get in. Both of you. Now,” Little Shiro said as he pointed towards his car. “I’ll take you home, Q.”
The two of them got in the back of Little Shiro’s car and sat down next to each other. The cop car drove past the accidents they had caused. JJDomer and Q looked away from the scene and looked at each other.
“Um,” Q said. “Sitting next to the guy who just dropped out of nowhere to kill you is kind of awkward.”
“Shut up,” Little Shiro said. “You’re getting a free ride home.”
“Little Shiro, merge lanes now,” JJDomer said.
“I’m trying but it’s not clear,” Little Shiro motioned his hands toward the busy lanes.
“But now! You gotta go now!” JJDomer persisted.
Little Shiro merged and the car behind them swerved into the median. “Look what you made me do!”
“It was fine,” JJDomer shrugged.
“No it wasn’t!” Little Shiro said as he ran his head across his forehead.
“Are you guys seeing that?” Q asked as he pointed out the rear of the cop car.
Both men turned around and looked out the back of the cop car. “Wow,” JJDomer mused.
“Yeah, that‘s different,” Little Shiro commented as he pulled off the exit. Q stared at the mass of white vans behind them. “They seem to be headed out of the city.”
“Yep,” Q said as he turned around in his seat. “Oh well. I bet there will be more parking spots open.”
“That’s what you’re thinking right now?” Little Shiro rolled his eyes. “Did you really take down the fourth Mafia.”
“I almost didn’t, thanks to someone trying to stop me,” Q stared at JJDomer.
JJDomer looked around. “Oh, yeah, that. I thought maybe you’d forgotten about that. Shiro merge!”
****
“Oh, before you go,” Little Shiro said as he dropped Q off in front of the bar. “Hand out these fliers, will ya? I was supposed to do it today but forgot.”
“Eh? Why am I doing your work?” Q asked. “And don’t you have a meeting to go to?”
“Just do it. And oh-“ Little Shiro said as he sped off. Q looked down at the fliers and opened the door of the bar.
“Q, you’re back,” Clair said. “Did you get the cherry coke?”
“Nope,” Q said as he slammed a piece of paper onto a table. Clair looked at him in shock.
“You didn’t get cherry coke?” she asked again.
“No,” Q said as he shoved Bano off the table he was sleeping on. “Everyone! I have our next assignment.”
Everyone looked at the man yelling in the bar. “We’re going to do a 5 K run for charity!”
“Why on Earth would we do that?” Yoyo asked. “No. No. I vote no. I don‘t run for fun.”
“Aren’t those things usually really early in the morning? Heck no,” Bano said.
“I think our team name should b-” Yoyo thwacked Q with her sword handle before he said it.
“We just said we’re not doing it. Listen to us you moronic man,” Yoyo yelled.
“Where’d you hear about a 5 K run?” Knssquad asked.
“After that stupid 5 guy got me kicked out of the store, the cops gave me a ride home away from the van army. Little Shiro wanted me to pass out fliers. I kind of just dropped them on the ground but then I read one and it sounded fun,” Q said.
Yoyo took a seat and pulled at her hair. “That story hurt my head.”
“When is it?” Clair asked.
“We’re not doing it. That’s final,” Yoyo said.
“Tomorrow,” Q said. “The grand prize is a thousand dollars.”
“Guys! Training begins right now! We’re not getting those 4 minute mile times if you don’t hustle!” Yoyo shouted.
“You know maybe it’s not such a bad idea. If it’s for charity and all,” Bano said. “I guess I can do something for the kids.”
Knssquad shook her head. “Bano that was almost as transparent as Yoyo. But what would I need the money for?”
“We’re gonna build a statue to Jake out of it! It will be made of quarters and seventy stories high,” Q said.
“Oh!” Knssquad cheered. “Can it dance, too?”
“Absolutely! And with glowing red eyes it will remind us all of the Jake we knew,” Q nodded.
“That sounds nothing like Jake,” Yoyo interjected.
“It should be able to burn things with the eyes. That way when people walk by it their hearts will be set on fire like Jake set our hearts ablaze!” Knssquad continued.
“Definitely! It will shoot love out of it’s eyes. Fiery love!” Q finished.
“Yeah, that’s definitely a giant killer robot. We’re not spending the money on a giant killer robot,” Yoyo shook her head. “We’re spending it on cookies.”
“We should use the money to get a big bed,” Bano thought. “I’d just lay there and life would be grand.”
“Yeah, but I feel like we keep going back to the statue idea,” Q answered.
“No!” Yoyo thwacked Q again. “We all agreed on cookies.”
“Now you’re the one being oblivious,” Bano said. “But it makes sense you’d want to spend your money on baking cookies in a kitchen, woman.”
“You pig-headed idiot! I’d get Temari to make them!” Yoyo shouted.
“Wait, what?” Temari said.
“That’s right, Temari! Bake those cookies and prove to Bano that he’s wrong about women in the kitchen,” Yoyo declared.
“We should make a portable room inside Jakes ear that we can use as a hide out for zombies,” Q said as he drew a stick figure on the table.
“The ear is the first place the zombies will look. Try his fingernails,” Knssquad said.
“Why are you encouraging him, Knssquad?” Bano shook his head. “So, Q? Are we really doing this 5 K?”
“Yep!” Q smiled. “It’ll be fun. A 5 K doesn’t sound that hard.”
Yoyo just groaned. “At least it‘ll probably be safe there. I doubt anyone dangerous would be at a charity 5 K run, even if the prize was a thousand dollars.”
“If only we’d known then what would happen when we went to that 5 K. And the misfortunes that would befall us there,” Q slowly moved his hands in front of Bano‘s face.
“What the heck are you doing?” Bano asked.
“Testing out that line when I tell this story in the future,” Q said. “This 5 K is clearly a bad idea.”
Everyone stared at Q and rolled their eyes. It had been a long day.
****
Mikel hadn’t been able to sleep at all. It was getting late but something was irritating him. He looked over at Cris who had fallen asleep in front of the Tv hours ago. “I know I need to sleep,” Mikel said. “But there’s just something weird going on.”
Mikel listened to Jan remind him he needed to sleep again and how important it was for him. He walked slowly out the door of the shack and looked across the hill. All over it tents had been set up for his gang. He knew they hadn’t loved the idea of returning to the hill. They weren’t going to question orders, though.
“Look, Jan,” Mikel said. “If I feel like something’s messed up how am I supposed to just sleep, hm?”
Jan continued to argue with him and he just shook his head. Maybe he was wrong, he wondered. But he couldn’t shake the feeling that he wasn’t. He gave one last look out across the hill and decided to call it a night.
As he closed the door to the shack behind him he realized it had gotten very bright inside the small shack. “Hm?” Mikel asked as he looked around.
He looked out the window and saw that a wall of white lights had surrounded the hill. He ran back outside and was greeted by the sound of horns going off. Crispi ran up to Mikel. “We’re under attack!”
Last edited by quater on Sun May 15, 2011 1:41 am; edited 1 time in total
